Well, this is a very different final update than I had planned back in January when I last posted on my plans to resume my first AoR campaign, Roke Squad. It is a bad news/good news update. The bad news is I decided last month, after talking to members of the group, that I really, really did not want to resume this campaign.
Why? (Since I obviously loved it and everyone had enough fun that I’d get asked when I was resuming.) There are a number of reasons. Most of them are specific to the GM–me–and maybe a bit to the group and so are more in the “Personal” category than “Probably helpful to other gamers and groups.” The reasons that are both takeaway lessons for me as a Not-so-Newb GM and might also help other gamers I will talk about here.
The major reason is, I was Just. Not. Feeling. It. Not even a little bit. I had been interested in finishing back in January. In fact, I got as far as coming up with ideas to tie up loose ends for each PC. Then, sometime in the following several months, I lost that bit of momentum. I’d sit down to try and flesh out those ideas–and nothing happened. I couldn’t keep focused enough to get anything down. When someone said, “Hey, “Let’s try Shiny New RPG” or “I am ready to do another arc of my Long Term Campaign,” I was all too willing to say, “Oh, sure, how about you do that before we restart AoR.” As I mentioned above the exact reasons why I stopped feeling it aren’t that important.
What’s important is that I didn’t want to recognize I wasn’t feeling it. So I tried to keep up appearances. My wake up call was when I made yet another, “Maybe I could resume GMing this after [Whatever]” comment in Discord (text) and a couple of my players called me on it. They were not mean–just very straight with me. They were not insisting that I say it was over, just, “You take some time and think about whether you want to run this any longer.” Yeah, it stung a bit. These players, my friends, didn’t like something I was doing and they told me so. That’s never fun.
But I did take their advice to think it over–but only overnight. Because by the next day all I was feeling was relief. I knew why I couldn’t get any planning done. I didn’t have to repeat, not even to myself, “Yeah, it’s still happening,” which, in hindsight, had been ringing hollow to me. What I felt next is what really surprised me. Right away, I was eager to GM again! I wanted to run some more AoR, even if it was just a one-shot or two. So I got back with my group, all of them this time, and told them everything. The group’s reaction was very positive! In fact, one of the guys who had originally brought up my lack of interest in more Roke Squad, was the first to offer suggestions on what to do for my next campaign.
And this brings me to the good news. I am prepping my second Age of Rebellion campaign! That first suggestion was for Onslaught at Arda I, which I had considered running for Roke Squad at one point, but discarded because it was aimed at PCs with little or no earned XP. As of this writing, I have skimmed through Arda, started going over the first episode more thoroughly, and have talked informally with players about PC ideas. I also have an old WEG SWRPG module I am converting as a one-shot, to both ease me back into GMing and provide a backup game in case someone is unable to run or play. So, by the time you read this, we will have had our Session Zero. Strike while the iron is hot, and all that.
Lessons learned time. The most important is Speak Up when there is or might be a problem with the game! Yes, I should have been the first one, as GM, to ask if the campaign should end. But I didn’t, because I ignored all the signs I was ready to put it aside. But even if you aren’t the GM, and you see an issue, talk to the GM. Maybe he has a blind spot. Maybe she thinks she is obligated to keep on; this was my biggest problem. Of course, it’s not limited to ending a campaign. When there is any problem in the group, someone has to say something before it can be solved.
Listen is the flip side. I wouldn’t be happily planning Campaign 2 with friends who are looking forward to “More Star Wars Gaming!” if I had stopped listening when Players 1 and 2 talked to me. Or if I’d sulked and ignored what they had to say, instead of thinking seriously about it, for as long as I needed to. And yes, the whole group would have been fine with whatever I decided, as long as I meant it.
The final lesson is that It’s okay to end your campaign just because, even. Yes, it’s a bummer, especially if some people are still interested. I know a GM who ended their campaign in midstream because the players said, “We are sick and tired of Game System and we don’t want to play anything that uses it. As of right now.” Ouch! I have also been unhappy in the past with GMs who have made the decision I did, and ended a campaign I really wanted to continue playing in. Now that I know how it feels to say, “Sorry, Campaign is over and done with,” I feel bad that I grumbled about it. Because I now have an idea of how they might have felt and thought.
So, I enjoyed my first AoR campaign, which was never intended to be more than a series of one-shots anyways. I am also grateful to my players for not only dealing with my learning curve, but are coming back for more, now that I’m hopefully a better GM. Plus, I have all those resolutions I can still keep for my Arda Campaign.
Linda Whitson
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